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Russian Linguistic Fun

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Tuesday, 23 March 2010 04:50

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Learning Russian is not only a hard work but a bit of a fun also. Here are the examples of how the misuse of the words or illiteracy can lead to some amusement.

Sometimes in Russia  you will see an ad saying "Продаётся пол палатки". The intended meaning was "Half of the pavilion is for sale", in Russian it must be written as "Продаётся полпалатки", but the words "пол" and "палатки" were improperly written apart, so the ad got the following funny meaning: "The floor of the pavillion is for sale"
Verb "to be" in Russian is "быть", the present form of it is "есть" (in English "am", "are", "is"), but there is another verb in Russian the infinitive of which is "есть" - "to eat". Consider phrase "we were, we are, we will be", in Russian it will be "Мы были, мы есть, мы будем", but the people when the want to make some fun out of it say "Мы были, мы есть, мы будем есть" which means "We were, we are, we will eat"

To Be or To Eat?

Verb "to be" in Russian is "быть", the present form of it is "есть" (in English "am", "are", "is"), but there is another verb in Russian the infinitive of which is "есть" - "to eat". Consider phrase "we were, we are, we will be", in Russian it will be "Мы были, мы есть, мы будем", but the people when the want to make some fun out of it say "Мы были, мы есть, мы будем есть" which means "We were, we are, we will eat".

Half a Tent or The Floor?

One display advertising in Russia read "Продаётся пол палатки". The intended meaning was "Half of the tent is for sale", in Russian it must be written as "Продаётся полпалатки", but the words "пол" and "палатки" were improperly written apart, so the ad got the following funny meaning: "The floor of the tent is for sale"

Other Jokes and Word Play

Many Russian jokes are possible because same words have more than one meaning (word play), or because the same phrase may be applicable to many different situation, sometimes very unexpectedly. There are also jokes that make fun of clichés and misspellings. Here are some of the jokes:

  • Моему компу уже шесть лет! В следующем году в школу отдам. (My computer is six years old! Next year, I am sending it to school.)
  • Муж - жене:- Наконец-то ты въехала правильно, только жалко, что не в наш гараж... (Husband to wife: You finally entered the garage properly. But unfortunately, nor ours...)
  • Искринни щитаю, што русскей чилавек должин знать свой изык. (This heavily misspelled sentence says "I sincerely believe that a Russian person must know his/her mother tongue.")
  • Почему вы меня все время отчитываете?!- Если хотите, могу и отпеть! ("отчитываете" here means "to reprimand" but can also mean "to read (a lecture)". "Отпеть" is related to the word "to sing" and contrasts the meaning of "read". The unexpected twist is that "отпеть" means "to read the burial service")
  • Теперь о вечном. Вечно я без денег... ("Now, about the eternity. I am always without money..." Here, "вечное" means "eternity" while "вечно" means "all the time, always")
  • На днях открыли памятник вандалам. Вандалы в растерянности. (The monument to vandals has been erected recently. Vandals are confused.)
  • А вы как на телевидение с завода попали? Блат? - Какой блат?! Сестла!
  • Вокзал: Каждому пасcажиру -- по мягкому месту!
  • - Выглядишь на все сто! - Сам знаю, что неважно. Мне всего 74.
  • Мне вчера жена говорит: «Пойди погуляй с собакой». Ну мы с Шариком и погуляли... на 300 баксов. ("Погуляй..." can mean "Go for a walk..." or "Go on the spree; party...")